Yeah...

I'm having one of those days.

Weekend. I'm having one of those weekends.

I'm not sure what's going on, but I just feel in a rut. Classes are okay, but my lab now seems never-ending, and then throw work stress in there and.. I don't even know. Mostly, I'm frustrated.

Frustrated that, while house-sitting this weekend, my wanting to buy a house and decorate just increased by ten-fold. I just kept thinking about how I'd decorate and what I'd put there... and having TV was nice, too.

Frustrated that I can't already be done with school and have a real job that will pay more than minimum wage.

Frustrated that I'm so far in debt from school loans, that I don't think I'll ever be not broke.

Frustrated that I rarely see my husband during the week, and then I feel like a horrible wife when the weekend comes around and he's tired and I get frustrated that he takes a nap and my plans get pushed back. Where do I get off getting frustrated for that? (Plus, then I think about all the girlfriends and wives who's husbands are in the army or military or whatever and never get to see their loved ones. Then I just feel worse.)

Frustrated to the point of almost crying at the most random things.

Frustrated that it's going to snow tonight, tomorrow and tomorrow night, and my car is really, really not good in the snow.

Frustrated that I can't skip ahead a few years so I can have a job, he can be on his way to getting a job, and we can sort of start to consider having kids.

Frustrated that I've lost touch with old friends, who I still care deeply about.

Frustrated that I've been meaning to write a wedding recap for myself before I forget all the small details... and I haven't.

And several other things that I won't even go into here... But, amidst all of this, I have to keep in mind how blessed I am.

I am healthy, I have an amazing husband who is so much more than I ever deserved to have. My family is and always will be there for me when I need them, and they're hilarious. (And amazing... I took this picture of my little nephew, Garrett, when I went home the other weekend...)



I have a roof over my head, food to eat, a car to drive, memories in my head... I have no right to be so frustrated with everything. I am lucky to be getting the education I am. So many people don't even get this chance. Heck, so many people have nothing. Some day I hope to be able to give to St. Jude's (or even do research for them) or Compassion International... Things that make such a difference for people. I want to be a part of that.

Anyway... I know this post is a bunch of randomness and complaining... Just one of those times I needed to get it off of my chest. I think I just need a break... a good cry. (I'm going to go watch PS I Love You... that should help that.) Things will happen in due time. Until then, I need to enjoy what's going on now. So... off I go.